Caleb in Rome

From founding Parousian Caleb Bernacchio:

Greetings from the Eternal City. I just wanted to thank everyone that participated in the roast. I especially thank everyone who did not mention everything which could have been said.

I arrived at about 8:30 in the morning on Wednesday, the Feast of St Francis. My arrangements to be picked up at the airport did not pan out. So I spent about fifty dollars to get to the Phillipino College where I thought I was going to be staying. Upon arrival I waited for a long time before they knew what they should do with a disoriented white man who claimed that he was staying at thier college. Other than the pair of workers I was the only laymen at the college and I was the only white man from America. They asked me to sit in the chair and wait for the rector. I sat down and fell asleep reading the Summa Theologica (thanks to Katie Culotta's offer to buy Gelato from Capital City Creamery, after the 7:00 AM Communion service, I only got about 3 and a half hours of sleep in the two nights before I found myself in Rome).

The Rector woke me up and informed that it was against the law for me to stay at the Phillipino College but he insisted that I eat lunch. Luckily two holy Phillipino priests, resisting the temptation to think that I was deranged, spent all day helping find a place to sleep. I was finally taken in by a convent in the room nearest the chapel. At about 1:00 PM the following day the Mother Superior sent one of the sisters to my room to make sure that I was still alive.

Part 2 later.